Monday, September 15, 2008

mucho frustriadano??

Today was very frustrating. The day started well, had breakfast, read a little bit of the Bible (more than I seem to be making time for other days *sigh*), caught my bus. Work was decent. I don't like to lie, I really don't. But today someone asked me if I liked my job and well, not really but I can't say that-those are the kinds of comments that get you fired. Heck, writing it on the world wide web probably isn't the greatest idea either. It's not that it's a bad job, God provided me with it-full time, permanent, immediately out of school-I can't ask for much more. I just want to be DOING something positive ... but as I'm reminded (often), God is using me even if I can't see it. So I told a lie to a co-worker and it irked me.

The bus ride from work to downtown is kind of what set the mood for my evening. A very rude man with his son in a baby carriage was obnoxious and rude to passengers (to the point of telling seniors to get out of his way-if I remember correctly) and it's just the kind of thing that makes me frustrated with my generation.

Then I came home, got changed and ran out to class and spent the next 4 hours with a very obnoxious group of high schoolers/young adults. 

Our pastor said on Sunday that our generation seems to think they're entitled to everything. It's so true! My parents have always said it and while I never agreed when it was directed at me ... :S I can see it. 

Even in my own walk of faith I find myself thinking about how I'm entitled to God's love. FOOL! I know I'm a fool and yet I can't seem to rid myself of the lie that I am entitled to salvation. If there's ONE thing in the world I am entitled to, it's an eternity apart from God-and yet because of His GREAT love for us, it's the one thing I won't have to experience, all because I accepted that I'm a sinner. And yet here I am, sinning again (yes, it's human nature-but again, no excuses!) And the amazing thing is, this salvation I've received is not because of anything I've done (see 'song of the week'-Casting Crowns-Who Am I). I've been praying for humility and I keep praying and every time I do, I get a little anxious about what exactly God is going to put in my path to teach me this very humbling lesson. But that's no reason to stop. 

Another lesson we learned on Sunday was how we 'the entitled generation' seem to give up praying after one prayer. One measly prayer! If our prayers aren't answered we give up faith (even for a brief moment) in God. How ridiculous. 

This is a faith journey and I'm a little scared, I'm not gonna lie.

3 comments:

  1. Amen Cole. I love how honest you are. It is definately much easier to have faith in retrospect, when I get down or discouraged I look at my past and see how God has helped me through then and I know that He will do the same this time around. Love you hon and keep the faith. I am praying for you always.

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  2. It's scary, but God will equip you for whatever comes your way; I guess that's how we learn to rely entirely on God and not on ourselves or the world. He's always at your side :)

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